Time to battle the world with the few people I have left. Brandon Hollis, Jamie Kendall, Amanda Griffiths, Jo Hollis, these people have been the ones who have made everything that has happend in the last 5 weeks possible. I am happily engaged to the most amazing man known. Now these are family. There is a saying that friends, boyfriends all end but family stay! WELL IT IS FUCKING BOLLOCKS! THEY...
The days have turned into week, the weeks have turned into months. I don’t see why I should be made to feel guilty about the decisions I have made over the last few weeks! I made the best choice in my life moving out. Because at last I can be the person I am! I am munchkin! And always will be! No one will ever change me! They say that times heals you! I don’t see how anyone who is sane...
It’s been a ruff few weeks with everything that has happened but I owe my life to Jamie Kendall, Brandon Hollis, Amanda Griffiths! That have seen me at my worst and pulled me back from the brink of a full on break down! With out these people i would no longer be here they are my world and rock! X
25 February 2013
Well things are getting better as time goes on, I have truly found the love of my life, his name is Brandon mark Hollis! He is everything I could ever want or need. He has had to deal with me when i have taken a turn for the worse, and we have come out the other side. He knows about my past and he has except that there are something that will always hunt me thought out my life. But he said and I...
15 February 2013
I’m so proud of my self today! I faced someone who killed me inside! Yes I will have a bad few days reliving what happened in my past! But I beat him! He doesn’t rule my life anymore! I can hold my head high and say I’m not scared of you anymore! You have ruled my life for so long! No longer will I let you do this again! I rule my life not you! I’m getting back to the old...
25 January 2013
Things are getting worse I don’t know how much longer I can keep going things are getting to deep for me to handle on my own! But I don’t want to tell anyone how I feel! I’m on my own in all of this I just need time to get my head around things! My mum makes things worse by saying she is happy when I know she isn’t I don’t know why she is still here things would be...
12 January 2013
Getting sick of feeling like this now! Why people say that they will help but they fucking don’t! As soon as you show signs of getting a little better they disappear! Don’t care anymore I don’t have anyone to battle the world with! Back to the old days here I come! Just me v the world! Round 25 here I come! Fuck anyone who walked out of my life when things became hard! This is...
5 January 2013
Sitting in a place that used to hold so many happy memories, thinking about the people who made those memories happy!! And realising that those people arnt a part of your life for a curtain reason! Just wants to make you cry! But you have to be strong for the people who are in your life now!
26 December 2012
I though that when your a child thins are meant to be easy! Can someone please take my life because feeling like this everyday is not easy!! How much longer do I have to suffer :’(
13 December 2012
Things are getting better! I have the people who mean the most to me close by my side and that’s where I plan to keep them, I’m not letting go of anything anytime soon!! Life is looking good now! Xx
7 December 2012
The last few week have been hard. As some people from my past have re appeared and made me retreat into the person I have toyed so hard not to be. Going back to my old ways of living again. Why is it he has this affect on me! He is nothing to me! He should be dead after what he did to me but no he still makes me feel like the venerable little girl I was when this whole thing started! Why!? Why do...
10 November 2012
When you are forced to take a step back and take a good long look at what your putting not only yourself but also your friends though, it makes you wonder how you still have friends! After falling out with my best mate this week over something so small and stupid! He told me some home truths about how I have been acting latley! I’m glad that he did because it made me take a big long look...
25 October 2012
When you realise that you always had people who would be there though thick and thin! Taken me till now to work that out
7 October 2012
Well things are good!
8th September 2012
When you find things about about your family and feeling like a little kid, worrying about everything but not knowing how to tell your parents! This might just be the death of me! # slowly dying inside
Life is looking up at last, my friends are there when I need them, my love life is looking up, things are good at last!
2 August 2012
I’m living a dream and I have just got to face that it’s never going to come true.
29 july 2012
Talking to people from the past makes life so much harder when you try and move on because there all that you think about, even know you know deep down it never going to work, its nice to hold onto something that is just a fantasy than face the normal!
27 june 2012
Things have hit a all time low again, i thought i had found someone who understood me and was a good lad but it just turns out no matter how much you think you know someone they are always unpredictable. Well i don’t know if i can just brush myself off and just carry on this time. He will be the first and last things i think about everyday for a long while yet, well time to out a brave face...
29th may 2012
When you get time to just sit down on your own and listen to some music it makes tour relise how bad you have been acting towards the people that mean the most to you! Time for a change!
22 may 2012
Well i would just like to say that things are finally starting to look up for me. There is a new fella on the scene, he is a lad i have known for a few years now, so we both already know so much about each other. The big black cloud has been lifted from above ne now, and its time to move on with my life xx
17 April 2012
Seeing you brings everything back
3 April 2012
When you look at someone and you get butterflies, but when they look at you they see a mate, :’(
30 March 2012
I have the feeling that everyone is happy with there partners and I’m just sitting here wishing I could have a little bit of happiness that they have :’(
13 march 2012
When you like someone, but they dont like you, is the worst possible thing everything:(
8 march 2012
When you sitting listening to someone you like, talk about all the girls that he is going to shag! It just makes you feel invisible
6 february 2012
I don’t know how long I can carry on putting this bare face on for everyone, when I’m dying inside!
20 january 2012
When i look back at the lads i have dated each one has made me stronger for the next, i realised the other day that life can be what ever you make of it, so you only have your self to blame if things go wrong nobody else, your in control! You decide your furture!
17 january 2012
Well life is looking up, i got my c, people are starting to treat with the respect that i deserve, and i have moved on, kyle is out my life for good now, and there is a new man in my life, i have decided that talking to my ex’s as best mates are not the best ideas because they never really get over you so it makes it harder to move on with your life, so from now on, ex’s are for a...
12 January 2012
Sitting on a bus where its all quiet, and your just alone with your music and your thoughts it amazing, because it gives you time to think about everything that is going on in life, whether it is good or bad, it doesn’t matter. Its time to reflect.
4 january 2012
This past week has been the hardest ever for me I belive, because I’m trying to get used to being on my own again, where I don’t have that person to curl up with and wish the day away, because I don’t, and I will agree, after everything that happened with me and kyle, I do still miss him, but there is no turning back now, its time to face the world on my own, I know its not going...
29 december 2011
well christmas was finialy goood in my house, but then he went a ruined it, yes i mean kyle cotton, as he and i have ended now, we are no longer together, as he stared a huge row because i was talking to a old friend of mine, he blocked me a room, and was very close to punching me in the face, yeah that is the true kyle cotton, and i want the world to know!
26 december 2011
Well seeing as Christmas is now out of the way it’s time to focus on my life, such as passing my exams and looking forward to my future with Kyle, wow, I carny wait xxx
17 December 2011
I just wanted to tell you all how much I love my family, my fiancé,my best friend, my nigerfa, my big bother and sister xxxxx
13 December 2011
Well things have been looking up really well for me this past few weeks, I have some amazing friends and extended family to keep me going through what ever I am faced with, I have a wonderful fiancee who I dont know where I would be with out him, my life is looking up, and I’m so glad, it’s just a shame that a few people close to me are having some very bad karma lately , but they will...
8 December 2011
Well after seeing how a true company works I can now see why are country is in so much debt, and not to mention how much money we are lending to other confers to bail them out the shit, how about they bail us out for a change, life us funny when you see it from a adults world , its bloody amazing, rant over!
7 December 2011
” life goes on” that is the mist amazing saying because it is so true in all parts of day-to-day life, and I live by this saying because you only have one life so live it I think. Rant over, my life is going great I have some amazing friends around me to support me thought tough time, and a amazing fiace who I could not live with out because well there is no other way to describe him...
3 december 2011
When you get the feeling that everyone around you don’t see you, as though your a shadow in the room. Make me feel horrible, but then again I have got used to this factor of life, because its how I live my life in my house these days, because its all about my brother, and I’m just like a logger in the house, nobody would care if I just disappeared :’(
29th november 2011
As the days go on, sertian people make you think about the way you have grow up so much compared to them, and I think this shows that I’m ready for what ever the big wild world has to offer me, and I’m probly more prepared than many of the people that are my so called friends, hmmm, I wonder what they will look like in 5 years time
28th november 2011
When you sitting with people who are ment to be you mates, running you life desions down, it makes you wonder, are they going to be there for me in 2 years time! I don’t belive they will and that hurts, but life goes on!
21 november 2011
Well life is defo looking up for me, and someone said to me, It my turn to have some good karma. And I have got that, as my amazing boyfriend kyle trey williams has asked me to become his wife! Not yet, sometime in the future, I was so happy last night I couldn’t sleep, its just how to tell my mum! Hmmmm, oh well I will leave that for now, and start thing about becoming mrs jessica...
15 november 2011
Well the past few weeks have been hell tbh, I lost feeling in my left arm for a full week! I have it back now, but its not normal as I call normal, doctors have no clue atm why this happened. I have now been told I have to re sit my english exam what is crap! Because I already have enuff stress on my plate. But at least me and kyle are still going! And I love him to bits xxxx
8 november 2011
When everthing seems to be going down the drain in your life, and you carnt understand whyy karma is punshing me, when I have only done good in my life.
3 november 2011
The days when you just reli carnt be arsed, and nothing is wrong with you yet, everyone asks if your okay, and you think to your self, its funny that when I’m fine everyone asks if I’m okay, but when there is something wrong no one asks, if just makes you wonder some times.
2 november 2011
Well after spending almost 4 weeks on macbeth in english, I am still no wiser on the plot or any of that crap! My english teacher is crap! With her monotone voice seems to put me to sleep very regular, which is not the best thing in my last year at school, when I have my gcse’s in january, but oh well, like my other blog stated I’m going to setal down and focus on my coursework.
1 november 2011
Well last night was funny, as I went out with all the lads and ladies who live by my house witch was great fun, and we had a great laught while they were trick or treating, and I was making sure the little ones will still together, I made a bad choise last night because I went out in heels witch made my feet kill, luckly, my amazing boyfriend was with me and carried me home, he is lovely! X
31 october 2011
Well as the weeks holiday is over and its back to the relity of school, I feel as though its time to put my head down and make something of myself, new start of me, and I’m going to stick to it this time.
30 october 2011
I have had a amazing weeks holiday, Monday- spent the day with my amazing boy, watching films and telly Tuesday- with my boy again Wednesday- went to work at GKN with my favourtie purson collin Thursday- work again, learning new skills Friday- work till 11, then when to see my amazing best friend then, when to physo, then went to see my fella with the best mate and harry(aka nig) who made me...